Nevermind, Brooke Mueller. We totally understand why you'd get back together with Charlie Sheen: the guy is hilarious!
TMZ has uncovered an actual email the actor sent an escort he found on a site called CityVibe. After attempting to call "Ginger," only to be met with a dead phone, Sheen did the next best thing: he sent a grammatically ridiculous email that made it clear just who she had the chance to meet...

Ure loss, Ginger!
Karen Carreno Bijou Phillips Marika Dominczyk Dita Von Teese Rachel Nichols
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